For those going back to school this week!

Something to cheer you up!

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A child comes home from his first day at school.

His Mother asks,

"Well, what did you learn today?"

The kid replies,

"Not enough. They want me to come back tomorrow."

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Stressing the importance of a good vocabulary, the teacher told her young charges,

"Use a word ten times, and it shall be yours for life."

From somewhere in the back of the room, came a small male voice chanting,

"Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda."

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Q: What did the instructor at the school for Kamikaze pilots say to his students?

A: Watch closely. I'm only going to do this once.

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A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait.

Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying: "A dollar per point."

The next class the professor handed the tests back out. This student got back his test and $64 change.